My Dad and my oldest brother just had a physical fight, my brother was in the wrong being cheeky saying “I’m not moving out” while doing kiss signs looking at my Dad and acting the big man, I had to step in and fight alongside my Dad against my brother.
It has cooled down and my Dad is moving out because he can’t stand him or my Mum, he said I can go with him and stay at his sister’s (my aunt’s) for a bit but I can’t, if I do I don’t know, if I stay it is shit and I will have to go work in a factory to pay the bills, if I leave I’ll have to go work and let my ambition and dreams fly away.
I haven’t had suicidal thoughts in such a long time, nearly a year, I am having them right now and I don’t know what to do anymore, I need someone, I need something, I have no one, I have nothing. I am going to become nothing so why drag it on and live years of slaving in a factory? When I could just end it now.
I just went back to the very first thing I ever reblogged on Tumblr and it made me smile.
I won’t reblog it but if anyone is interested, it’s this:
Sometimes I think about how horrible you have been and can be and I don’t care about you and then other times I think about you and I just think like “wow, I’ll never see you, speak to you nor feel you ever again for the rest of my life. one day I’ll be dead in the ground and I still wouldn’t have felt you because you’re not with me anymore”
I don’t know, I think I’m weird but I think about things like that, like the fact that this is it, one day you’re not going to be alive and even to that day you wouldn’t have felt me again. Meh.
So they gave me tons of condoms and shit when I got birth control today, right. So, they were laying on my bedside table and my mom’s like
“Why do you have so much taco bell sauc- oh wait WHAT”
DJKSJKFHDSAJKFHASDKFSA
haha!
(via letolove)
I’m sure I reblogged this already quite recently but… EAT PUSSY… oh, I totally do.
